Sunday, November 10, 2013

Feeling Redundant

I don't know what it is (probably seasonal affect disorder), but as soon as the weather starts to change from hot to cold, I start feeling so BLAH.  It seems like I start living a Groundhog Day life--every day is the same as the one before, which is the same as the one before, etc. etc.  It feels like life gets more routine, and I'm the girl who hates too much routine.  I've been feeling the same about this blog. I feel like I keep saying the same things over and over, and is there really any point in continuing to write about how Anderson struggles with weird ebb and flow behavior issues, how Amelia continues to deal with her tininess, and how crazy our lives are? I'm not sure. I'm just not sure.  I read a lot of blogs, and I feel like if I kept reading the same things over and over, I'd probably quit reading.

The problem is, I really LOVE writing.  It's kind of an outlet, something I do for me. A little guilty pleasure. I like having a written document that I can look back on and see what was happening with us at any given point in time. That's definitely cool. But I also like writing for others, to make people laugh, to make people feel good about themselves because I make plenty of mistakes, and there's nothing more true than the statement "Misery love Company". Hello, Misery--you're in good company here. Probably more than half of the things I do in life, I could reflect upon and safely say that I'd have done things differently. That feeling is what unites us, the commiserating when things don't go as planned, or when our choices end up creating chaos. I get that kind of camaraderie from reading other blogs, and I hope that people get the same warm-fuzzy from mine.

I know, I know...ramble ramble ramble.  I'm just reflecting upon what I'm doing here, in this space. Whether it's meaningful, or just me alternating between story-telling and bitching, over and over.  Something to think about. In the meantime, to make this more useful, a few snippets of what's been going on with us.

**Amelia is suddenly a super sponge for learning. She has gone from asking the annoying kiddie questions that kids ask when they suddenly realize that they CAN ask questions, to asking really good questions about the world around her. Why does it get dark at night? Where does the sun go?  Why do the leaves change colors? What does that word say? I find I never get tired of her wondering. I am fascinated by how her brain processes things, and of course I can't help but be amazed that my one-pound wonder who was just destined, according to her doctors, to have diminished cognitive ability, is thinking and inferencing and in awe of everything. I am enjoying her so much right now. She is logical, and smart, and funny.

**Anderson is...well, he's still Anderson. :-)  Behaviorally speaking, he's doing better. Sleeping--not so much. I can't wait for their 5 year check-ups to talk to the doctor about it. The circles under his eyes are ever-present these days. He's very, very into "cooking" right now, especially mixing with his mixers. He is always in the kitchen, cooking up something. He continues to crack us up with the crazy things he says, and like all of the stores right now, he's already looking forward to Christmas. It's funny--he isn't the kid who is all about the presents. When you ask him what he wants for Christmas, he might say "an elevator", or something, but toys aren't exciting to him. He is more interested in the ritual of the holiday (go figure, right?). Last week he told his teacher that "Daddy is going to clean up the living room, and move the table, and build the Christmas tree, and put some lights and ornaments on it".  He can't wait for us to get out our little light-up village--he talked about that at school, too. I think he truly just loves the season, and I have to say, it's infectious. Not infectious enough for us to start decorating, though. I'm standing my ground on refusing to decorate before Thanksgiving.

**Anderson has what we can only assume is an imaginary friend.  Her name is Chessie. He talks about her all the time. Chessie lives in a little bitty house, and goes to his school. Chessie is a kid, but also a teacher there, apparently. He laughed uproariously when I asked if she took naps at school, as if that were ludicrous.  I'm kind of getting a kick out of it. I actually had two imaginary friends myself, as a kid. Keeker and Boomer. I talked to them all the time and my family got a huge laugh out of my descriptions of them. Apparently imaginary friends are supposed to be a sign of intelligence. Not so sure, but he's definitely a creative little dude.

Well, nothing more to share, I don't think. I have to make our Trader Joe's run before the kids wake up because we didn't get to go to Hollister yesterday, and we all know that's just not acceptable. Enjoy your Sunday.

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